The Power of Priorities

My husband really struggles with perspective. When things are crazy at work, he is like a charging bull-

he puts his head down and charges through until the task is complete-
It is actually a quality that I admire and truly believe it is one of his greatest strengths- charging bulls do NOT get distracted by their environment. They see that bright red tease of the conquistador and that is ALL that they can see!
It is also one of his biggest weaknesses. This incredible focus and determination also prevents him from seeing a beautiful sunset or a fleeting rainbow,

dancing in the rain,

A sudden & massive downpour- gone in 5 minutes!

or sensing the needs of a struggling child!

Smiling but having a REALLY hard day :'(

Because of a recent life changing event in his life, he has the blessing and opportunity to re-invent himself a little. He has been more responsive than he has ever been before to my way of thinking (we definitely have a yin/yang relationship) and we have spent a lot of time talking about growth, perspective and priorities! On Thursday, we had the opportunity to talk about ways to set his priorities in order. Taking from Steven R. Covey's teachings and principles of balance, I suggested that hubby dear write his number one priorities. Those priorities will go FIRST into his calendar and 'to do' lists! After they have been accounted for, he can add in other tasks and chores!

As a result of our little chat, I felt the need to take a quick check into my own life balance as well. Though I study this topic thoroughly, counsel and advise others frequently, and practice all the techniques I know for physical and mental balance; it is important to check in with yourself once in awhile. It is far too easy to get distracted and have balance disturbed.

As I pondered my own life balance and priorities this past week, I noticed one thing that created within me a wake up call to awareness of my own goals and dreams. I have this dream, it's been with me for as long as I can remember- but I've always just kept it on the back burner as a "one day" type of dream! As I studied and had to report frequently on Time Management for a class I was taking last semester, I realized that not only is a 'dream unwritten merely a wish', but I also realized that by burying this dream in the context of secret life's desires, I had inadvertently tucked it a way, committing to myself that it would never manifest in my reality!!!

OOOOOOOHHHHHH! I did not like this idea at all, but I KNEW it was true! In order for anything to come into reality, it must be lived, talked about and acted upon as if it IS a reality! The problem that arises is that because dreams are often so ambiguous, it is hard to commit to them when the bills need to be paid, a child forgets their homework, or you see a spec of dirt on the floor (I'm an OCD housewife, by the way).

So acting on the advice I gave him, I sat down to pinpoint my priorities. I made a list of things that are MOST important to me. These things almost ALWAYS fall to the bottom of my lists (or worse yet, to 'tomorrows' list, which is where tasks go to die in my world)! When one of these things does make it into my day, there is a good chance that I DO NOT enjoy it as much as I should because of guilt for what I am NOT doing or fear that I will neglect something more important and let someone down!

*** Just a quick word of advice- if you hear in your mind or feel in your heart words like "fear", "shame", "guilt", or "regret" KNOW that these words do NOT exist in the current moment!! These are words that indicate you are living in the past or the future- both of which don't really exist- so do NOT let these feelings stick around. (more on this topic another day)

Because I think holistically- body, mind, and spirit- my list is separated this way as well. But here it is:

My Top 3 Personal Interests

1. Exercise

2. Study

3. Writing

My Top 3 Family Joys

1. Travel

2. Play

3. Food

and My Top 3 Spiritual Desires

1. Study

2. Worship

3. Family History (both for my posterity and my ancestors)

Eat, Sleep, Teach, Repeat

Please notice that clean floors, perfectly kept bedrooms and sparkling windows are NOT on these lists. Though a clean and orderly house is very important to me (did I say I suffer from OCD housewife syndrome?), it is NOT what is going to get me into Heaven nor is it the legacy I want to leave behind. I DO have to fit it in- I can't deny that-
BUT
...I have to make room for the true desires of my heart first. This perspective is what fuels dreams, harnesses power and drives personal success. I may not get to these items EVERY day- but if I have gone weeks without these priorities, there is a good chance I'm living a life off balance and off my chosen journey!

What would be your top 3 priorities and what can you do to make sure these priorities are making it into your daily life?
Go out and live the life you dream, the life you cherish, the YOU you were meant to be!


Blessings & Balance to you and yours,
TKP

Happy New Years- 2013

I know, I know,
to some people this seems a little late!

Some people are already well on their way
to accomplishing their goals for the New Year.

Well not me,
I learned several years ago that I just
wasn't very good at setting and
KEEPING New Years Resolutions.

And then I figured out why,
it's not that I am a bad goal maker
or a bad goal keeper
or even a bad goal accomplisher...

it's that I need to give myself time to
recover and reflect before I make a
bunch of plans to renew!

When I make my goals after the holidays,
I concentrate on "repair" type goals
or "reaction" goals- things to put my life
back in order after the chaos of the busy
holiday season.

You know the ones:
* Lose 5-10 pounds (or more)
* Exercise More
* Keep my house clean
* Organize my closets...

But what I have found is if I give myself
a recovery time;
time to get my feet back underneath me,
time to clean up Christmas,
get the hubby & kids back in a routine,
than I am able to focus on things that really
matter- that will REALLY make me a better
person. NOT perfect,
but definitely closer to who I want to be!

Usually I wait for the kids to return to
school and my hubs to return to work.
I give myself one week to recover from
holidays, get the house cleaned up
and my routine back and running.
I aim for the third week of January to get started,
but if for some reason, I need another
week, I give it to myself.
I don't rush myself,
because I am planning my own personal
work of art---
ME!! (that sounds self centered, but I promise, it's far from it)

In the meantime, I ponder & I pray!
I am going to say, I put A LOT of thought
into my New Years Goals and
I am also going to say
"It is Totally Worth It"

We plan goals in four areas:
1. Spiritual
2. Physical
3. Mental
4. Personal
(this year I added an extra one)
5. Family (I am the only one tracking
this one in our home, and the only one 
that knows about it- sneaky huh??)

Last year, I bought a special journal
for tracking my goals and it worked
WONDERFULLY-
I am doing it like this from now on.

I keep four sections, one for each area,
and than write my goals for that area.
I leave enough room for tracking and
any journal or note taking I might need.
And on a regular basis (you decide what regular
is to you) I checked up on myself and
recorded my progress.

I LOVED it!!! LOVED, LOVED, LOVED it!!

If you haven't made New Years Resolutions yet,
or you never make them- I honestly
would suggest you try this.
It is NOT too late. Who says the Year of YOU
has to start on January 1??

I will tell you all about my 2012 goals tomorrow!
It was seriously an amazing year!!

Spring Serendipity

Before I get started,
Just let me say that I loved the book
Spiritual Serendipity by Richard Eyre
It literally changed the way I look at life!

So onto my story:
Last week was Spring Break in good ole'
Frisco, Texas!!
Actually, I am certain it was Spring Break
in all of TEXAS and maybe even all of
the Southern States because there
were NO beach hotels to be had
ANYWHERE!!!
and I mean
ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So what did a Momma Bear
who desperately needed to get AWAY do?

Well, I looked at the map (that's kind of funny
if you know me at all, cause I don't look at maps)
so I looked at GoogleMaps
and came up with Nashville, TN!

We could drive there in a day,
It could be a short trip (we only had 5 days)
and they had hotel vacancies!

It was our first NON Beach/Swimming Resort
family vacation in over 4 years-
(I love me a BEACH day-
not gonna lie)
and we had a GREAT time.

Because it was a very last minute planned trip
and because my heart just wasn't in it,
we didn't do a lot of PRE-planning!
Not like me at ALL.

We had to leave late on Friday night, so
we knew on the way there we would stop
half way. Our reason was that we didn't
want to have some time in Nashville on Saturday
but couldn't leave until after 5 on Friday.

When we woke up in Little Rock, Arkansas,
my husband looked at the map for the first time
(by the way He does look at maps)
and realized we would be driving right
through Memphis, TN.
A quick google search confirmed that
"Yes indeed, Graceland is in Memphis"
and did any of us want to go?

I totally burst out laughing,
just as two of my kids and my husband
said "Heck yes, we want to go!"

So we went to Memphis, TN,
a place I had no prior desire to go,
and went to Graceland

(also a place I had no prior desire to go)
to pay homage to the King of Rock n Roll!

My family LOVED it

my eclectic daughter Loved Elvis' family room

We decided to eat/play at Hard Rock Cafe,

because we have a cult following to them.

While there, we decided that since March is
the birthday month of child #3,

and this is the year she turns sweet 16,
we would celebrate at every restaurant we
ate at on our vacation-
Hard Rock did not disappoint as they got her up
on stage and had her perform a
Charming rendition of "I'm a Little Teapot"

Oh boy, Oh boy-
the actress in her came out!


Well Hard Rock Cafe in Memphis happens
to be on Beale Street-

which we didn't know anything about-
but it happens to be quite the famous little street

with a very lively atmosphere!

Our first day of Spring Break was
WONDERFUL,
full of memories, excitement and JOY-
and absolutely 100% last minute and unplanned!

You may know about my little sugar addiction!
Actually it is not little,
it is a full blown problem,
and cupcakes are a big part of the problem-

But upon arriving at the hotel in Nashville,
I asked the valet where the nearest
cupcake store was?
We all died laughing when he looked across
the street and pointed at a Gigi's Cupcake Store!

But for three days, we had HORRIBLE luck
getting cupcakes from them!
So this led us to look up all the cupcake stores in
Nashville! Did I say ADDICT????

Well there are several,
but we discovered two that we couldn't leave
without visiting.
The Painted Cupcake &
The Cupcake Collection

At The Cupcake Collection
we learned the story of a family of 7
who had arrived in Tennessee from
New Orleans with literally nothing but
a hope for a better life.
I loved meeting the mother of this family,
her children and the adorable girls
she calls her own only because they
she has adopted them into her crew.

If you can believe,
I love People's Stories,
even more than I love cupcakes,
so it is no surprise we went back
for another batch or cupcakes
so I could hear more of their story!

The day we happened upon
The Cupcake Collection,
the sun was out,
the skies were blue
and we didn't have any firm
commitments to our schedule.

So we took a walk.
We were in Germantown and could see
the State Capitol Building,
so we thought we would walk up to that.

On our walk, we stumbled upon a cute little
grassy area surrounded by towers with bells.

Our little stroll was just prior to 11 and as we
were trying to decide what we had found,
the bells started ringing!

We were delighted, to say the least.

It turns out we had happened upon
Centennial Park,
which is a long stretch of park that commemorates
Tennessee and the people who have called
Tennessee home.

My heart was touched by all that we saw and read,

and I found myself relating to this Park
and relating to it on a very personal level.

I have a vision of my family-
a family that is united in good times
and bad!
A family that plays together,
prays together
and works hard together for truth and right!
I want children who understand that service,
in all it's forms, is the most noble work that
a person can do
and that standing for who you are and
where you come from is what Family is all about.

Our trip was amazing in many ways,
but I loved these few moments of complete
Serendipity-
"the accident of finding something good or useful without looking for it"

I needed these little touches of beauty-
but there is NO way I could have planned them
into my life!
I am a planner,
an over planner actually,
but this vacation that was wrought with
"winging it" was just what I needed

to bring balance and JOY back into my life.

It is Spring-
the perfect time to find your own
Serendipitous Adventure